A bloated floater lazily drifted ashore with murder on it’s mind! This putrid, decomposer with the the swollen duck lips was packing heat in his shorts or um… somewhere (I’ll leave it to all y’alls imaginations). I’ve heard of these types, they lure you in with their pouty lips and then BAM! Two to the dome. Never trust corpses, people.
Orrrr… maybe he was just shot in the head and dumped. But come on people, which scenario is more entertaining?